BRANDOLAND: Talking to God...For You!

Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Randi

People...

Randi just said (at about 2:50 PST) that she has a sick feeling that the Bushies are keeping the troops in Iraq just to "protect the contractors" and other American biz interests.

Your thoughts, please.

*

Also, a quick bit from the Guardian's piece on Al Gore:
In the US, Mr Gore's environmental campaign has sparked a backlash from some on the right who accuse him of scaremongering.

A series of television advertisements, launched by a thinktank called the Competitive Enterprise Institute, argue that carbon dioxide emissions are a sign of American productivity and progress.
Comedy.

You can't make that stuff up.

More later...

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Just Have the Baby, For Chrissakes!

People: Thanks for putting up with the light posting. Heavy stuff will resume ASAP.

In the meantime...

Woman balks at having 6/6/6 'devil' baby

Boo! Have the baby!
CAVERSHAM, England, May 30 -- A woman in England due to give birth on June 6 is fighting with her hospital to induce her sooner to avoid delivering on the demonic date of 6/6/6.
The Number of the Beast!

Sacrifice...is going on tonight!
Melissa Parker, 30, said as a fan of "The Omen," a movie about a demonic child, she's genuinely concerned about the numerology involved, The Sun reported Tuesday.

"I'm terrified the birth will go wrong or the child will have evil in him or her," Parker said. "Even worse my beautiful baby could be the devil himself -- the anti-Christ."
He's already alive.

His name is Gary Coleman.
The figure 666 is mentioned in the Bible and various cultures believe it represents the date the anti-Christ will appear on Earth, but that doesn't hold any water at the Royal Berkshire Hospital.

A hospital spokesman said Parker's request for an induction was refused because due dates are not 100 percent certain.

"There is little we can do to change them without a Caesarean or inducing the child, which we try to avoid," the spokesman said. "We must let nature take its course. The baby will be born when ready, no matter what day it is."
Damn straight.

I'm cooming back!
I will return!
I now posess your body and I'll make you burn!

Oh, by the way?

High court limits whistleblower lawsuits


Bastards.
WASHINGTON - The Supreme Court on Tuesday made it harder for government employees to file lawsuits claiming they were retaliated against for going public with allegations of official misconduct.

By a 5-4 vote, justices said the nation's 20 million public employees do not have carte blanche free speech rights to disclose government's inner-workings. New Justice
Samuel Alito cast the tie-breaking vote.
Gee, you're kidding?

More later...

Monday, May 29, 2006

Memorial Day, '06

People...

The General says it best:
War is a horrible thing. It destroys generations. It puts soldiers into terrible situations where they are forced to mortgage their souls. It is not something that should be entered into unless no other option is available. That’s Bush’s crime.

War with Iraq wasn’t his last option. It was the only one he pursued.

So on this Memorial Day, please take a few moments to remember all of the casualties of this war and take a vow that those responsible will not go unpunished.

It’s the only right way to truly honor the dead, the disabled, and the damned.
More later...

Friday, May 26, 2006

Yahoo Message Board Friday

Time for a quick installment of "Yahoo Message Board Friday," where I troll the YMB's for the trolls who troll the YMB's.

House Republican firm on immigration bill

One story, loads of hate!

Info:
WASHINGTON - The House author of a border security bill that triggered massive street protests stood firm Friday against amnesty for illegal immigrants and predicted tough negotiations with the Senate on compromise legislation.

*

"This will set up a very difficult House-Senate conference committee because the approaches taken by the House and Senate on this issue have been 180 degrees apart," said Rep. James Sensenbrenner, chairman of the Judiciary Committee and principal author of the more stringent House bill.
Here come the trolls.

Dashrr 2000 writes:
HOUSE WILL BITCHSLAP SPICS BACK TO MEXI - The house will beeochslap these illegal spics back to spicsville and they will have to kiss Whitey's ass to get back in the USA! Why you ask?

BECAUSE WHITEY OWNS THE PLANET!!!
Whitey also leaves retarded messages on the internet.

Italotango says:
Now I'm LEGAL Wow! Thanks BUSH! Today was a nice day for me, yesterday I was an Illegal, TODAY I'm LEGAL :) Tomorrow I will be an American Citizen! Thanks Bush! Thanks GOPs! Thanks Rednecks to Elect the Cesar BUSH, Hahahah!
Hey Gringo now you will clean my house OK?
Apparently, there's a point in there.

Cosininflames breaks down the economic costs of the bill:
$5 Tomato's and $10/lb Bacon - Thanks to the Republicans.
EA Swearengen (from Deadwood) disagrees:
Amnesty would result in $20 Tomato's and $500/lb bacon.
Having said that, a Deadwood whore will still cost you about $10. Right?

wbwbruce joins the tomato/bacon fracas:
GROW YOUR OWEN FN TOMATOES EAT BEEF STFU
NYAH.

Somehow...through all the screaming...the voice of reason (ddnlj) cries out from the wilderness:
Cheap labor does not keep prices down. It helps big business put more money in its own pocket. The consumer never sees the savings.
What say you?

More later...

Faux

Faux:
While (Ian) Spiegelman has called Page Six the "attack arm" of Rupert Murdoch's tabloid, he said Murdoch's News Corp. "will go all out to flatter every thug communist in China when it thinks it can score a satellite-TV deal there."

"One time I was looking into an item about a Chinese diplomat and a strip club when word came from somewhere up above that China had carte blanche," he adds.

"The message I got was more or less, 'If you mention Chinese, you'd better be ordering lunch.'"

Enemies included "anyone who thought the war in Iraq might not be the best of all possible adventures to pursue," says Spiegelman. "On several occasions I had to quote some homophobic press release from the Catholic League because [some editor] thought they made a good point."
Your liberal media at work.

More in a bit...

Thursday, May 25, 2006

A Pardon Coming?

People...

Lay, Skilling convicted in Enron collapse

Whoa:
HOUSTON - Former Enron Corp. chiefs Kenneth Lay and Jeffrey Skilling were convicted Thursday of conspiracy to commit securities and wire fraud in one of the biggest business scandals in U.S. history.

The verdict put the blame for the demise of what was once the nation's seventh-largest company squarely on its top two executives. It came in the sixth day of deliberations following a trial that lasted nearly four months.
Think "Our Kid" will throw a pardon at the Ken-ster?

I'm waiting...

More later.

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Chick Update & a Quick Test

First, a Chick Update.

Dixie Chicks lead singer Natalie Maines claims that their new motto is, "What would Bruce Springsteen do?" (Or WWBD.)

The only question you need to ask...really.

Here's your "Quick Test": The Onion or Fox?

1. ‘Al Gore’s Global Warming Movie: Could It Destroy Our Economy?’

2. "All-Out Civil War in Iraq: Could It Be a Good Thing?"

3. "Puerto Rico Celebrates Dependence Day"

4. "'Special' Forces Sent to Iraq"

5. "Are Democratic leaders who criticize the war in Iraq actually aiding the terrorists?"

Consider that last one a freebie.

(answers in the Haloscan.)

Here's one from The Simpsons: "Do Democrats Cause Cancer?"
Fox News Announcer: Welcome to Fox News, your voice for evil.

Tonight, we'll be interviewing the top two candidates for Springfield's 24th Congressional district. For the Republicans, beloved children's entertainer, Krusty the Clown. And for the Democrats, this guy.

Democrat: Hey, I have a name.

Fox News Anchor: Yes, I'm sure you do, comrade. I do appreciate your being here. You're usually so mired in sleaze, it must be an effort to come down to the studio.

Krusty: May I say something?

Fox News Anchor: Certainly, Congressman.

Democrat: He hasn't won yet!

Fox News Anchor: You make a very adulterous point. We'll now conclude this debate with a Krusty campaign commercial.
More later.

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

More Conservative Babies!

People...

Country radio nixes Dixie Chicks

"Nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah!"

You've got to give it to the Chicks -- they made the album they wanted to make. And now...they're telling Nashville to "suck it."
NASHVILLLE, Tenn., May 22 (UPI) -- It appears the war U.S. country radio stations mounted against the politically outspoken Dixie Chicks has not abated in the least.

The band is promoting "Taking the Long Way," its first album since Natalie Maines told a London audience in 2003 she was ashamed to be from the same state as U.S. President George Bush. The comment sparked a radio boycott of the group's music.

Although the album hits stores Tuesday, the first two singles from the album are not getting widespread airplay, Billboard.com reported Monday.

The first single, "Not Ready to Make Nice," only peaked at No. 36 on the Billboard Hot Country Songs chart and the second single, "Everybody Knows," is moving downward after its peak at No. 48.

WKIS FM in Miami reported it pulled "Not Ready to Make Nice" due to listener complaints after only one week.

The program director at KUBL/KKAT in Salt Lake City told Billboard he was angered by its "self-indulgent and selfish lyrics."
Wa-wwwaaaggghhh!

Here are some of those, uh, "self-indulgent and selfish" lyrics --

I made my bed, and I sleep like a baby,
With no regrets and I don't mind saying,
It's a sad sad story
That a mother will teach her daughter
that she ought to hate a perfect stranger.
And how in the world
Can the words that I said
Send somebody so over the edge
That they'd write me a letter
Saying that I better shut up and sing
Or my life will be over

I'm not ready to make nice,
I'm not ready to back down,
I'm still mad as hell
And I don't have time
To go round and round and round
It's too late to make it right
I probably wouldn't if I could
Cause I'm mad as hell
Can't bring myself to do what it is
You think I should


Welcome to our side, ladies. You've got a new fan.

(You'll have much more fun hangin' with Pearl Jam and REM. Trust me.)

More later...

Monday, May 22, 2006

Tales of Big Conservative Babies, Part ?

Monday.

Bo!

By now, you've heard the story of Jean Rohe, the New School grad who led the push against Sen. John McCain at the NY university's commencement ceremony.

Her words...have drawn the wrath of McCain aide Mark Salter (via the HuffPo):
It took no courage to do what you did, Ms. Rohe.

It was an act of vanity and nothing more. And please don't worry about the Senator's discomfort with you. He has managed to endure much worse. McCain was once offered release from imprisonment and torture because of his father's position as a senior military officer. He declined because he would not leave his comrades behind, and thus, willingly, accepted four more years of hardships life will spare almost all of us from. In his political career he has shown the same character he showed as a Navy officer all those years ago. He has, over and over again, risked personal ambitions for what he believes, rightly or wrongly, are in the best interests of the country.

What, pray tell, have you risked? The only person you have succeeded in making look like an idiot is yourself.

You took exception to the paragraph in which he lightly deprecated the vanity of youth. Well, Ms. Rohe, and your fellow graduates's comical self-importance deserves a rebuke far stronger than the gentle suggestions he offered you.

So, let me leave you with this.

Should you grow up and ever get down to the hard business of making a living and finding a purpose for your lives beyond self-indulgence some of you might then know a happiness far more sublime than the fleeting pleasure of living in an echo chamber.

And if you are that fortunate, you might look back on the day of your graduation and your discourtesy to a good and honest man with a little shame and the certain knowledge that it very unlikely any of you will ever posses the one small fraction of the character of John McCain.
So there! Nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah.

Wwwaaaggghhh!!!

More later...

"You guys have it real easy.

I never had it like this where I grew up. But I send my kids here because the fact is you go to one of the best schools in the country: Rushmore.

Now, for some of you it doesn't matter. You were born rich and your going to stay rich.

But here's my advice to the rest of you:


Take dead aim on the rich boys. Get them in the crosshairs and take them down.

Just remember, they can buy anything but they can't buy backbone. Don't let them forget it.

Thank you."

Sunday, May 21, 2006

Privatize This

Again - thanks for checking in - crazy busy - will get back to heavy posting this week.

In the meantime...

Misjudgments Marred U.S. Plans for Iraqi Police

Among other things.
Field training of the Iraqi police, the most critical element of the effort, was left to DynCorp International, a company based in Irving, Tex., that received $750 million in contracts.
That would be a, uh, private defense contractor.
The advisers, many of them retired officers from small towns, said they arrived in Iraq and quickly found themselves caught between poorly staffed American government agencies, company officials focused on the bottom line and thousands of Iraqi officers clamoring for help.
"Company officials focused on the bottom line."

That's why we LIBTARDS believe that ya can't privatize "everything."

When it became clear that the civilian effort by DynCorp was faltering, American military officials took over police training in 2004, relying on heavily armed commando units that had been established by the Iraqis.

Within a year, members of the Sunni Muslim population said some units had been infiltrated by Shiite Muslim militias and were kidnapping, torturing and executing scores of Sunni Muslims.
More later...

Thursday, May 18, 2006

He's Pat!

Regular readers...

Again --

Sorry for the light posting: New gig, time crunch, blah blah blah.

In the meantime...

Robertson: God Says Tsunami Possible For U.S.

Place your bets!
"The Rev. Pat Robertson says God has told him that storms and possibly a tsunami will hit America's coastline this year.

The founder of the Christian Broadcasting Network has told viewers of "The 700 Club" that the revelations came to him during his annual personal prayer retreat in January.

"If I heard the Lord right about 2006, the coasts of America will be lashed by storms," Robertson said May 8.

He added specifics in Wednesday's show.

"There well may be something as bad as a tsunami in the Pacific Northwest," he said.
Lord?

"WHAT?"

Is he right?

"LOOK - I THINK IT'S SAFE TO SAY THAT - YES - THE COASTS OF AMERICA WILL 'GET' SOME STORMS IN 2006 -- "

They usually do --

"HAVING SAID THAT - I'VE NEVER USED THE WORD 'LASHED' IN A COMPLETE SENTENCE - AND THE CLIPPERS WILL BEAT THE SUNS TONIGHT."

Got it.

More later...

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Crazy

Working - in LaLa Land - comedy jokes - but want you to read this:

Italian Pay-off From Niger Forgery?

Bad b-movie kinda stuff from Alternet.

"What did the Italian government, under then-Prime Minister Berlusconi, get in return for providing Bush with a smoking gun to attack Iraq?"

Crazy...
Italian journalists and parliamentary investigators are hot on the trail of how pre-Iraq War Italian forged documents were delivered to the White House alleging that Saddam Hussein had obtained yellowcake uranium ore from Niger.

New links implicating Italian companies and individuals with then-Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi now raise the question of whether Berlusconi received a payback as part of the deal -- namely, a Pentagon contract to build the U.S. president's special fleet of helicopters.
Read the whole thing.

More later...

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

She likes music, you know?

Bono's paper is out in the UK (via The Independent).

Here are Condi's "Top Ten" music picks:

1. Mozart
Piano Concerto in D minor

2. Cream
'Sunshine of Your Love'

"Believe it or not, I loved acid rock in college - and I still do."

3. Aretha Franklin
'Respect'

4. Kool and the Gang
'Celebration'

5. Brahms
Piano Concerto No 2

"It's a stormy, difficult piece, but I'm going to learn to play it before I leave this earth!"

6. Brahms
Piano Quintet in F minor

7. U2
"Anything."

8. Elton John
'Rocket Man'

"It brings back memories of college, friends, my first boyfriend."


9. Beethoven
Symphony No 7

"Quite simply the greatest symphony of all time."

10. Mussorgsky
Boris Godunov

Not a joke.

More later...

Monday, May 15, 2006

Total Information

People...

Take the time to bone up on the Total Information Awareness program...if ya haven't already (via the ACLU).

Big Brother...wants to watch you...and he wants his buddies to profit from the deal.

(The dKosopedia has more on the TIA, too.)

More later...

Sludgereport

It's really weird, but...

Sometimes Drudge beats the big lefty sites (Buzz, Kos, TPM) to the stories that actually help our side. (Dunno why: Methinks he misreads 'em.)

Today:

Federal Source to ABC News: We Know Who You're Calling

Info from ABC's Brian Ross and Richard Esposito:
A senior federal law enforcement official tells us the government is tracking the phone numbers we call in an effort to root out confidential sources.
"We" means "reporters."
"It's time for you to get some new cell phones, quick," the source told us in an in-person conversation.

We do not know how the government determined who we are calling, or whether our phone records were provided to the government as part of the recently-disclosed NSA collection of domestic phone calls.

Other sources have told us that phone calls and contacts by reporters for ABC News, along with the New York Times and the Washington Post, are being examined as part of a widespread CIA leak investigation.

One former official was asked to sign a document stating he was not a confidential source for New York Times reporter James Risen.

Our reports on the CIA's secret prisons in Romania and Poland were known to have upset CIA officials.

People questioned by the FBI about leaks of intelligence information say the CIA was also disturbed by ABC News reports that revealed the use of CIA predator missiles inside Pakistan.

Under Bush Administration guidelines, it is not considered illegal for the government to keep track of numbers dialed by phone customers.

The official who warned ABC News said there was no indication our phones were being tapped so the content of the conversation could be recorded.

A pattern of phone calls from a reporter, however, could provide valuable clues for leak investigators.
Freedom of the press.

Ha!

More later...

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Pickles to the Rescue

This is too easy:

Laura Bush doesn't believe bad polls

Pickles to the rescue:
Interviewed on Fox News Sunday, Laura Bush said she did not think people were losing confidence in President George W. Bush, despite a series of polls showing support for him at its lowest point in his five-year presidency and among the lowest for any president in the past 50 years.

"I don't really believe those polls. I travel around the country. I see people, I see their responses to my husband. I see their response to me," she said.

"As I travel around the United States --
The Bizzarro United States --
I see a lot of appreciation for him. A lot of people come up to me and say, 'Stay the course'."
Yeah, the hand-picked twenty-nine percenters.

Nice try, though!

More later...

Saturday, May 13, 2006

Read Between the Lines

Questions Raised for Phone Giants in Spy Data Furor


Read between the lines on this one, will ya?
Qwest was apparently alone among the four major telephone companies to have resisted the requests to cooperate with the government effort.

A statement issued on behalf of Mr. Nacchio yesterday by his lawyer, Herbert J. Stern, said that after the government's first approach in the fall of 2001, "Mr. Nacchio made inquiry as to whether a warrant or other legal process had been secured in support of that request."

"When he learned that no such authority had been granted, and that there was a disinclination on the part of the authorities to use any legal process," Mr. Nacchio concluded that the requests violated federal privacy requirements "and issued instructions to refuse to comply."

The statement said the requests continued until Mr. Nacchio left in June 2002. His departure came amid accusations of fraud at the company, and he now faces federal charges of insider trading.
Really?

Wonder when those "accusations" began?

They will get you, man. They will get you.

More later...

Friday, May 12, 2006

Yahoo Message Board Friday

Yo.

Every Friday is "Yahoo Message Board Friday."

Usually, I post a bunch of comments from the brilliant minds on the YMBs. Today...only one.

The story: Murtha Predicts U.S. Pullout From Iraq

The info:
WASHINGTON - Rep. John Murtha, a Vietnam veteran first elected in the anti-war fever of 1974, says American troops will be brought home from Iraq by 2007.


Either President Bush will bow to public opinion or Democrats will have won control of the House of Representatives and increased pressure on the White House, Murtha, D-Pa., said in an Associated Press interview Thursday.
One man's reaction:
DEAR IDIOT LIBTARD TRAITORS

Run dont walk to the nearest suicide assistance center, you are suffering from liberal mental disorder, while LMD is easily diagnosed, there are only two cures:

1:assisted suicide: (murder to the non afflicted)

2: open your heart,muster up some courage, and tell yourself the truth.

Now since libtards have no heart, no courage, and no truth, I would be happy and honored to ASSIST you with cure #1.
There you have it...the greatest YMB post ever.

I have something to do today: I must find electronjerry so he can assist me with cure #1.

I simply cannot live with "liberal mental disorder."

Remember, kiddos...

"Brilliant minds think alike!"

More later.

Thursday, May 11, 2006

"You Can't Handle the Truth!"


People...

The following stories have pushed me over the edge: I can't take it anymore.


The Republican Agenda for 2006: Tax Cuts for a Favored Few
($69 BILLION!)

&

NSA has massive database of Americans' phone calls

("The National Security Agency has been secretly collecting the phone call records of tens of millions of Americans, using data provided by AT&T, Verizon and BellSouth, people with direct knowledge of the arrangement told USA TODAY.")

So...fuck it...I've reached maximum density with the latest news from Bushworld. Every single day...is a freakin' onslaught.

Iraq, Iran, the return of the Taliban in Afghanistan, war profiteering, Plamegate, Hookergate, $4 gas, Dick, Don, Tom and Condi, domestic surveillance of "left-wing" organizations, immigration reform, reform of any kind, the "new" cold War, FAUX, HUD, Santorum, Hastert and Frist - the what commission?! - Rove, Rove and Rove, yada yada yada, blah blah blah.

On top of that...Skull & Bones has Geronimo?!

I've come to the conclusion that - and, please, excuse my French - they're gonna continue to fuck us in the face...they're gonna continue to take as much money from the National Treasury as is humanly possible...and they're gonna set up the next few money making schemes (natch wars)...until we wake the fuck up and run these lizard-people out of DC.

It's out of control...and I've lost the ability...to be eloquent.

On that note, a few words from Rep. Jim McDermott (D-Goodguyland):
By controlling what you know, they hope to control what you think.

It is the solution to their Iraq dilemma. You don't have to mislead people, as the President did, if the American people simply do not know at all.

That's what this assault on free speech is all about.

The President and his Administration are doing everything possible to impose censorship. They know that secrecy is the fastest, most effective way to silence dissent.

*

Before us are two choices: the free flow of information, or the outright control of information.

America is strong because of the protections within the free flow of information--it's our First Amendment to the Constitution.

But the President and Republican majority want to tell you what to think through the outright control of information.

Geoffrey R. Stone, author and law professor at the University of Chicago, wrote an article in the New York Times the other day called "Scared of Scoops."

As the writer points out, the Administration's primary tactic is intimidation.

When in doubt, they try to make you afraid.

When unpopular, they try to make you afraid.

When they are losing their hold on power, because of their record, they intend to make you afraid.

The only reason you know this President has no energy plan for America is because he can't hide the price of gasoline at the pumps.

He'd make it a secret if he could, so don't be surprised if the President tries to classify the price of gasoline as a national security matter.

In a nation where free speech is the last line of defense against absolute power, they don't want you to know, because the more you know, the worse they look.
I've said this before and I'll say it again: When some of our leaders (and media folk) start sounding like Prof. Chomsky? There's still hope.

More later...

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Ugly Americans, Part Dos

Today's headline on CNN.com --

Behavior guide targets 'the ugly American'

Quick info --
WASHINGTON (Reuters) -- Alarmed by the relentless rise of anti-Americanism around the world, a business-backed group is trying to change the behavior that spawned an enduring stereotype of Americans abroad -- loud, arrogant, ill-dressed, ill-mannered and lacking respect for other cultures.
Waitaminute, me blogged about this...a month ago!

* * *

People...

Traveling abroad?

Worried about gettin' pegged as a "Yank?" Gettin' spit on in the Cock & Bull? Hassled for bein' W-supporter?

Don't worry, Ugly Americans, help is on the way!

'Speak softly, don't argue and slow down'

The State Department is "looking out...for you!"
The reputation of the "Ugly American" abroad is not...just some cruel stereotype, but - according to the American government itself - worryingly accurate.

Now, the State Department in Washington has joined forces with American industry to plan an image make-over by issuing guides for Americans travelling overseas on how to behave.

Under a programme starting next month, several leading US companies will give employees heading abroad a "World Citizens Guide" featuring 16 etiquette tips on how they can help improve America's battered international image.
Important note:
Business for Diplomatic Action (BDA), a non-profit group funded by big American companies, has also met Karen Hughes, the head of public diplomacy at the State Department, to discuss issuing the guide with every new US passport.

The goal is to create an army of civilian ambassadors
.
Created by Karen "Mother Hen" Hughes.

Unbelievable.

Some tips, people:
Think as big as you like but talk and act smaller. Talking about wealth, power or status - corporate or personal - can create resentment.

Save the lectures for your kids.

Speak lower and slower.

Your religion is your religion and not necessarily theirs
. Religion is usually considered deeply personal, not a subject for public discussions.
"Have you accepted Christ as your personal lord and savior?"

"'M Catholic, miss. We dunna do tha'."

"Then you're going to hell."

"An' you are out o' yer fookin' 'ed!"
If you talk politics, talk - don't argue: Steer clear of arguments about American politics, even if someone is attacking US politicians or policies. Agree to disagree.
"He lied you...yobbos into this war so his cronies could make a few pounds."

"The world changed on 9/11!"

"And you are either stupid - or naive - or both."

"Can I have a headset, please?"

"Piss off!"
Keith Reinhard, one of New York's top advertising executives, who heads BDA, said:

"Surveys consistently show that Americans are viewed as arrogant, insensitive, over-materialistic and ignorant about local values.

That, in short, is the image of the Ugly American abroad and we want to change it."
Good luck!

On that note, remember the simplest move if/when things get hairy in the pub:

"No, dude, I'm Canadian."

Goo loo goo goo goo goo goo goo.

More later...

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

John Conyers

Starting a new writing gig today: Not much time to post.

However...

By now, you've heard the latest Repub talking point: "If the liberals take control of Congress in the fall...there will be...hearings! And...they'll try to impeach the President...in wartime! Waaaggghhh!!!"

A sub-talking point is aimed at John Conyers (D-Mich), one of the true Democrats in the House.

During his appearance on ABC's This Week, Tom DeLay went so far as to say that Democrats should not be allowed to take back the House because, "John Conyers will be the Chairman of the Judiciary Committee..."

Tim Russert repeated that "fear" during his Meet The Press sit down with Nancy Pelosi by ominously stating that, "The chair of the Judiciary Commitee would be someone named John Conyers" if the Dems took over.

(As if Timmeh didn't know who Conyers was.)

Conyers responds...via the HuffPo. The real issue...is congressional oversight:
Perhaps Mr. Russert has forgotten, but I have been a Chairman before. For five years, from 1989 to 1994, I was the Chairman of the House Government Operations Committee, now called the Government Reform Committee.

I have a record of trying to expose government waste, fraud and abuse.

That was back when Congress did something called "oversight."

You know, in our tri-partite system of government, when Congress actually acted like a co-equal branch. The Republican Congress decided to be a rubber stamp for President Bush instead.

Perhaps, if we had a little oversight, we wouldn't be mired in a war based on false pretenses in which we have lost thousands of our brave men and women in uniform and tens of thousands of innocent Iraqis.

Perhaps we would not have had an energy policy drawn up in secret with oil company executives that has led to gas prices of more than three dollars per gallon.

Perhaps, if we had a little oversight, we wouldn't have a prescription drug plan written by the pharmaceutical companies, that prohibits the government from negotiating for lower prices with the same drug companies, and that no one really understands.

Perhaps, if we had a little oversight, we would know the extent to which our own government is spying on our phone calls, emails and other communications, contrary to the law of the land.

Oversight should not be a partisan undertaking. As we saw in the late 90's, when oversight is used out of anger or spite, or to gain partisan advantage, the American people express their strong disapproval.

Personally, I have had enough partisanship for the last six years to last a lifetime and I think we need to bring the American people back together.

But we also need to serve their interests. Congressional oversight is part of that. It is a check and balance, designed to protect the American people from too much power being concentrated in too few hands.

If I become a Chairman again, I intend to push for oversight of this Administration.

Our Constitutional system of government requires no less.
The stakes are high, people.

And the Repubs are running scared.

Gonna be an ugly summer.

More later...

Monday, May 08, 2006

The USDA & the War on Terror?

People...

The USDA on Iraq: Everything's Coming Up Rosy

You're gonna love this:
Career appointees at the Department of Agriculture were stunned last week to receive e-mailed instructions that include Bush administration "talking points" -- saying things such as "President Bush has a clear strategy for victory in Iraq" -- in every speech they give for the department.

"The President has requested that all members of his cabinet and sub-cabinet incorporate message points on the Global War on Terror into speeches, including specific examples of what each agency is doing to aid the reconstruction of Iraq," the May 2 e-mail from USDA speechwriter Heather Vaughn began.

The e-mail, sent to about 60 undersecretaries, assistant secretaries and other political appointees, was also sent to "a few people to whom it should not have gone," said the department's communications director, Terri Teuber.
I'm assuming that those "few people" were the career/non-Bushie folk in the USDA.
The career people, we are assured, are not being asked to spread the great news on Iraq in their talks to food stamp recipients, disadvantaged farmers, enviros or other folks.

The e-mail provided language "being used by Secretary [Michael O.] Johanns and deputy secretary [Charles F.] Conner in all of their remarks and is being sent to you for inclusion in your speeches."

Another attachment "contains specific examples of GWOT messages within agriculture speeches. Please use these message points as often as possible and send Harry Phillips , USDA's director of speechwriting, a weekly email summarizing the event, date and location of each speech incorporating the attached language. Your responses will be included in a weekly account sent to the White House.

*

There's a sample introduction: "Several topics I'd like to talk about today -- Farm Bill, trade with Japan, WTO, avian flu . . . but before I do, let me touch on a subject people always ask about . . . progress in Iraq."

See? Smooth as silk.

So then you talk about how "we are helping the Iraqi people build a lasting democracy that is peaceful and prosperous." If it looks like the audience is with you, try to slip in the old Iraq/al-Qaeda/terrorism link and say Americans are helping build a country "that will never again be a safe haven for terrorists."

Loop suggestion: With the polls showing that only about 40 percent of those surveyed actually still buy the linkage thing, you may want to use some discretion here lest you lose the audience.

The e-mail shows how to weave in a comment that times are tough for Iraqi farmers. "But revitalization is underway. President Bush has a clear strategy for victory in Iraq structured on three tracks -- political, economic and security."
Hopefully, this stuff will be applied to the other agencies (Dept of Interior, HUD, FDA, yada yada).

Examples:

1) "I'm here today to celebrate the re-opening of over 150,000 acres of land in the Teton National Forest. I'm also here to celebrate...the Global War on Terror...and the importance of fighting the evildoers over there...before we have to fight them over here.

Imagine if...Al-Qaeda attacked the Broulim's (grocery store) in Driggs...or the post office in Swan Valley."


2) "HUD has been working closely with the governor's office...and making great progress in the construction of over 500 new homes for some of Baltimore's neediest families.

Just like the President, who is making great progress in Iraq...and the Global War on Terror."


3) "The FDA will apply tougher standards to the pharmaceutical companies who are creating these new vaccines, and will provide important information to families who are concerened about autism and vaccinating their childrern.

Our goal is the health and well being of every newborn child in the United States of America...and victory in the Global War on Terror."

More later...

Sunday, May 07, 2006

Our Kid

People...

Bush's best moment in office? Reeling in big perch

Say what?
BERLIN (Reuters) - U.S. President George W. Bush told a German newspaper his best moment in more than five years in office was catching a big perch in his own lake.

"You know, I've experienced many great moments and it's hard to name the best," Bush told weekly Bild am Sonntag when asked about his high point since becoming president in January 2001.
Umm...
"I would say the best moment of all was when I caught a 7.5 pound (3.402 kilos) perch in my lake," he told the newspaper in an interview published on Sunday.

*

Because Bild could not immediately furnish English quotes, Bush's comments were translated from the German. The paper said the White House planned to release an authorised English version of the interview on Monday.
Can't wait.

He's the leader of the free world, you know.

"Now watch this cast."

More later...

Saturday, May 06, 2006

Think About It

From the NY Times article on the Goss resignation:
The (CIA) was widely viewed as being at odds with the administration over the Iraq war, and the White House gave Mr. Goss marching orders to end what it saw as a campaign of leaks to the news media by agency insiders who opposed administration policies.
If the CIA is at odds with the Neo-cons re: Iraq...what does that tell you about the Neo-con plan?!

Josh Marshall has more on that "campaign to end leaks"...with help from the L.A. Times:
The perception that Goss was conducting a partisan witch hunt grew, too, as staffers asked about the party affiliation of officers who sent in cables or analyses on Iraq that contradicted the Defense Department's more optimistic scenarios.
Break that down.

Staffers...asked about the party affiliation...of officers...who sent analyses on Iraq...that contradicted...the Defense Department (meaning...Rummy).

I mean...the Defense Department's "more optimistic scenarios."

Wow.

Think, think, think.

(Fixing facts to fit the policy?)

Does "truth" matter anymore?

"You can't handle the truth!"

More later...

Friday, May 05, 2006

YMBF: Brilliant Minds Think Alike

Yes, kiddos, it's "Yahoo Message Board Friday!"

A smattering of brilliant thoughts from the minds of the YMB users.

Let's begin, shall we?

Bomb Kills 3 U.S. Soldiers in Iraq

Info:
BAGHDAD, Iraq - A roadside bomb killed three U.S. soldiers south of Baghdad on Friday, and coalition forces shot to death three insurgents in Samarra — the site of the bombing of a Shiite shrine in February that set off a wave of sectarian killings in
Iraq.

The violence came as a videotape showing the most wanted terrorist in Iraq, Abu Musab al-Zarqawi, wearing American tennis shoes and struggling to fire a U.S.-made machine gun was repeatedly broadcast on television nationwide.
Here they come!

Americafirst usaforever writes:
FASTFORWARD TO NOW...LIBS.

NAMELY BILL CLINTON UPSET OVER HILLARY FUOKING VINCE FOSTER HAS HIS 'SUICIDE' STAGED TO GET RID OF HIM...BY WHO ??? LIB THUGS...YES, MY FRIENDS...LIBS HAVE A NETWORK OF DIRTY KILLERS WHO DO THEIR 'WORK' FOR THEM...AND THE LIB MEDIA COVERS IT UP FOR THEM...SAD...SAD DAY FOR AMERICA....LIBS SHOULD NEVER HAVE CONTROL AGAIN...ITS TOO DANGEROUS FOR AMERICA.
Whoa.

Thanks for the "heads up" on those "dirty killers." Not sure who you're talking about, but I'm sure they're out there.

Speaking of dirty killers, bushsavesyourass simply writes:
libs love terrorists, kills babies
That's supposed to be a secret!

georgetheleo asks...
When are Ivy League Grads enlisting?? lol - as soon as the joos do - which is never
The joos? You mean...?

Yes, of course you do.

(They'll enlist as soon as the Bush Twins do.)

wipe hands on pants says:
I KEEP HEARING ABOUT HOW NEW TERRORISTS

are being born every day, and how the Iraq war is making terrorism worse. Let me tell you something: For every new terrorist, there are hundreds of young American Conservatives coming of age that believe in the right to protect our freedoms and liberties, traditional family values, the sanctity of life, love of country, faith in God. Don't be discouraged by the negative 'chicken little' rantings of the left.
If "love of country" means "having blind faith in your leaders"...agreed!

(You know what I love about my country? The Grand Tetons, Wrigley Field, the East Village, the Frontier Restaurant in Albuquerque, and Casa Bianca in Eagle Rock, CA. But that's just me.)

Oh, lookee! bushsavesyourass is back:
libs losers traitors homos
You forgot "commie faggot pinkos." "Tree-hugging socialist lesbos."

Otherwise...point taken!

Moving on...

Ex-CIA analyst condemns Bush 'manipulation campaign' on Iraq


Info:
MADRID (AFP) - A former Middle East specialist of the US Central Intelligence Agency has condemned what he called an organised campaign of manipulation by the Bush administration to justify the Iraq war.

Paul Pillar, a former CIA analyst specialising in counter-terrorism in the Middle East and Asia, said in an interview with the Spanish newspaper El Pais that the United States had particularly wanted to prove a link between Al-Qaeda and Saddam Hussein.

"That was not the case," he was quoted as saying. "I suppose by some definitions that could be called a lie."

"There was an organised campaign of manipulation," El Pais also quoted Pillar as saying. "That would be the proper way to define it."

The decision to invade Iraq was taken as early as the beginning of 2002, a year before hostilities began, Pillar said.
Heavy "lib" news...that needs to be crushed!

the crow will fly is up to the task...
**Pillar lies: there WERE proven links

Besides the recently translated Iraqi documents showing Iraq was funding Al Qaeda arm Abu Sayyaf, it was known from the 2002 Abu Zubaydah debriefing that Iraq was on friendly terms with senior Al Qaeda lieutenant Abu Musab al-Zarqawi.
The crow then links to the WEEKLY STANDARD for more info to support this claim.

Methinks the crow just flew into a big ol' picture window.

Russian Media Warn of New Cold War


The story:
MOSCOW - A Russian newspaper said Friday that Vice President Dick Cheney's harsh criticism of Moscow's human rights record signaled the start of a new Cold War.

The Kommersant business daily compared Cheney's speech Thursday in neighboring Lithuania to Winston Churchill's famous "Iron Curtain" speech in Fulton, Mo., saying in that it "marked the beginning of a second Cold War."
Sounds like the "lib media" is attacking the old man again.

YMB users to the rescue!

da2da2 shouts:
AMERICA WOULD WIN !!! WE WOULD LAZER ANY INCOMING IBM, THEY CANNOT STOP OURS!!! WAKE UP, DUMBASSES!!!
OK! JESUS! I'M UP!!!

da2da2 continues the attack!
FUCK YOU RUSSIA! YOU ARM EVERY COMMUNIST REGIME ON THE PLANET!!
YEAH! FUCK YOU! RAAARRGGHHH!!!

(Feels good, doesn't it?)

Finally, dabbmw2002 says...
LIBS IN LA LA LAND- CHENEY IS RIGHT

I have yet see anyone on this board address what he said and actually refute that. Why not, because he is right.

just a bunch of useless rhetoric-then again, when have libs ever done anything useful
The answer is "never."

On that note, I have to make a trip to Trader Joe's: I'm out of coffee. I mean...LIBTARD juice.

Remember...

Brilliant minds think alike!

More later...

Thursday, May 04, 2006

A Lotta Hanukkah Receptions

Yo.

Quick note for you SoCal college kids...and a follow-up to yesterday's story re: free drugs in T.J.

U.S. Urges Mexico to Rethink Drug Law

"Urges them to rethink?"

How about, "tells them to get their fucking act together."
"U.S. officials ... urged Mexican representatives to review the legislation urgently, to avoid the perception that drug use would be tolerated in Mexico, and to prevent drug tourism," U.S. Embassy spokeswoman Judith Bryan said.

There are concerns the measure approved Friday by Mexico's Congress could increase drug use by border visitors and U.S. students who flock to Mexico on vacation.
Ya think?!

Moving on...to the far left-wing of the left-wing party.

Please sign MoveOn's petition re: "Net Neutrality."

("The Man" wants you to pay more for the PRIVILEGE of surfing the net via his "pipes." Thinks he's getting ripped off. Currently. This whole issue is crazy...but it can happen here.)

Finally...

Team Abramoff Visited the White House over 200 Times in Bush’s First 10 Months in Office

Ha!
The Secret Service released logs showing the comings and goings of convicted Republican lobbyist Jack Abramoff and members of his staff at the White House that present a jaw-dropping level of access to the Bush Administration after the 2000 election:

"Abramoff was a $100,000 fundraiser for Bush [in 2000] and lobbying records obtained by the AP show his lobbying team logged nearly 200 meetings with the administration during its first 10 months in office on behalf of one of his clients, the Northern Mariana Islands."

As Keith Olbermann pointed out last night, someone from Abramoff’s firm was at the White House every business day for 10 months through October 2001.
Enter Scott McClellan.

From the WH Press Conference, January 18, 2006.

The WH Press Corps had already gotten wind of the above mentioned meetings: They wanted to now how many times Jack had been to 1600...and why:
Q: Scott, just quickly back to Abramoff. Can you give any more specificity on those meetings, when they were, years, times?

MR. McCLELLAN: NO, this is sticking with our past policy.

We’re not going to engage in a fishing expedition.

Q: Not even years? I mean, you’re talking about –

MR. McCLELLAN: Well, the Hanukkah receptions were back in 2001 and 2002.

Q: Okay, you talked about the Hanukkah receptions. Can you talk about the staff-level meetings and what years those were, or –

MR. McCLELLAN: NO

Q: And why would you tell us the Hanukkah –

MR. McCLELLAN: I did a check for you all, to provide you that information. But we’re not going to engage in a fishing expedition. I know that there are some that want to do that.

But I don’t see any reason to do so.
200 trips to the WH: That's a lot of Hanukkah receptions!

"Shalom, Pee-wee! My name is Shalomo."
More later...

"La la la!"

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

"T.J., Bro!"

People...

Mexico to Allow Use of Drugs

"T.J., bro!"
MEXICO CITY — Mexican President Vicente Fox will sign a bill that would legalize the use of nearly every drug and narcotic sold by the same Mexican cartels he's vowed to fight during his five years in office, a spokesman said Tuesday.
"Senor Frogs, bro-ham!"
The list of illegal drugs approved for personal consumption by Mexico's Congress last week is enough to make one dizzy — or worse.

Cocaine. Heroin. LSD. Marijuana. PCP. Opium. Synthetic opiates. Mescaline. Peyote. Psilocybin mushrooms. Amphetamines. Methamphetamines.

And the per-person amounts approved for possession by anyone 18 or older could easily turn any college party into an all-nighter: half a gram of coke, a couple of Ecstasy pills, several doses of LSD, a few marijuana joints, a spoonful of heroin, 5 grams of opium and more than 2 pounds of peyote, the hallucinogenic cactus.
"Rosarito, bro! Woo!!!"

Beats "quarter beers," I guess: Read the whole piece.

"Ensenada! Ow!!!"

More later...

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

The Greatest Story Ever

People....

Mock Iraqi Villages in Mojave Prepare Troops for Battle

Get ready:
In a 1,000-square-mile region on the edge of Death Valley, Arab-Americans, many of them from the Iraqi expatriate community in San Diego, populate a group of mock villages resembling their counterparts in Iraq.

American soldiers at forward operating bases nearby face insurgent uprisings, suicide bombings and even staged beheadings in underground tunnels.
Your tax dollars at work...way out there past the "World's Largest Thermometer" in Baker, CA.
Recently, the soldiers here, like their counterparts in Iraq, have been confronted with Sunni-Shiite riots. At one village, a secret guerrilla revolt is in the works.

With actors and stuntmen on loan from Hollywood, American generals have recast the training ground at Fort Irwin so effectively as a simulation of conditions in Iraq and Afghanistan over the past 20 months that some soldiers have left with battle fatigue and others have had their orders for deployment to the war zones canceled.

In at least one case, a soldier's career was ended for unnecessarily "killing" civilians.
"But, sir, they were just extras from Barstow!"
The troops who come here are at the heart of a vast shift in American war-fighting strategy, a multiBILLION-dollar effort to remodel the Army on the fly.

Here, the Army is relearning how to fight, shifting from its historic emphasis on big army-to-army battles to the more subtle tactics of defeating a guerrilla insurgency.
Enter...Apollo Creed.
It is a marriage of military technology and Hollywood fakery; some 350 Arabic-speaking Iraqi-Americans and plainclothes Nevada National Guardsman live here almost year-round to offer American trainees what one officer described as "a vortex of chaos."

The insurgents even get acting lessons, coached by Carl Weathers, best known for his portrayal of the boxer Apollo Creed in the "Rocky" films.
What? Carl's Predator co-star, Jesse "the Body" Ventura, wasn't available?

"Ain't no time to bleed!"
The most prolific killer of American trainees, for instance, is Mansour Hakim, the Iraqi pseudonym for Staff Sgt. Timothy Wilson, 42, a probation officer from Sparks, Nev. In Medina Jabal, Sergeant Wilson, in an Arab dishdasha robe and checkered kaffiyeh headdress, plays the part of a village hot dog salesman who sells his provisions from a stand called "Kamel Dogs Cafe."

To the amazement of American trainers, Sergeant Wilson has found that nearly every American unit entering the training course falls for his tricks — usually leading to catastrophic results. He figures he has "killed" hundreds of American servicemen in his time here.

The trap works like this: When the American soldiers first enter Medina Jabal, they usually head straight for the Kamel Dogs stand for a snack. Chatting up the soldiers, "Mr. Hakim" asks if the Americans might let him sell his hot dogs inside the nearby American camp, called Forward Operating Base Denver, to make some extra money for his family.

The soldiers inevitably agree, and before long, Mr. Hakim is ferrying huge loads of hot dogs and charcoal briquettes onto the American base.
You know the rest: It ends with an explosion.

Please read the whole piece.

*

Someone in the Haloscan felt like I was taking issue with the military for this program. I'm not: I think it's kinda cool, and see its intense value for troops who have to head to Iraq.

Having said that...

At a BILLION DOLLARS A DAY and counting...

Opening up another cheap labor farm in the Middle East - I mean - gaining control of the world's resources - I mean - "bringing democracy to the region" - is getting really freakin' expensive.

More later...

"Kill Libs!"

Hey now.

No joke - someone out there on the "internets" found Brandoland by doing a "kill libs" Google search.

Unbelievable: What a dick.

Speaking of...

There was some dickish behavior at yesterday's march in Seattle:
SEATTLE -- An immigration rights march that drew thousands of people of all ages and races was marred by a car that struck a group of marchers at a downtown intersection.

Demonstrators surrounded and began beating on the car after it hit and slightly injured three people Monday afternoon, and the driver was arrested for investigation of assault, police Officer Debra Brown said.

Five other people were arrested for possible weapons violations and one person for obstructing police, Brown said.

Police would not give an official estimate of Monday's crowd, while estimates by organizers ran from 30,000 to 65,000.
The jackass factor is high these days, isn't it?

More later...

Monday, May 01, 2006

Is it May? Aaaggghhh!!!

Yo.

Ah, Christ: It's May.

How did that happen?!

Two quick things today before I head out into LaLa Land:

Colbert quotes:
"And though I am a committed Christian, I believe that everyone has the right to their own religion, be it Hindu, Jewish or Muslim...I believe there are infinite paths to accepting Jesus Christ as your personal savior."

"Now, I know there's some polls out there saying this man has a 32% approval rating. But guys like us, we don't pay attention to the polls. We know that polls are just a collection of statistics that reflect what people are thinking in "reality." And reality has a well-known liberal bias."

"I stand by this man. I stand by this man because he stands for things. Not only for things, he stands on things. Things like aircraft carriers and rubble and recently flooded city squares. And that sends a strong message, that no matter what happens to America, she will always rebound with the most powerfully staged photo ops in the world."

"The greatest thing about this man is he's steady. You know where he stands. He believes the same thing Wednesday, that he believed on Monday, no matter what happened Tuesday. Events can change, this man's beliefs never will."

"And as excited as I am to be here with the president, I am appalled to be surrounded by the liberal media that is destroying America, with the exception of Fox News.

Fox News gives you both sides of every story, the President's side and the Vice President's side."
Pure genius.

(LK - did you write any of this stuff?!)

Moving on...to David Sirota's new book Hostile Takeover: The World Pulled Over Our Eyes to Blind Us From the Truth. (Inspired by The Matrix, Sirota breaks down the way that the Establishment hides the "truth" from the public: Straight Chomsky stuff.)

He's talking about the book on Josh Marshall's TPM Cafe:
The fact is, most of that nonsensical political discourse is designed to hide the two fundamental truths that nobody wants to talk about, but everyone knows: that our "democracy" is really a legalized bribery, and that every outcome in this system of legalized bribery is one that exclusively serves the interests of Big Money.

As my book details, this reality is obscured by one of the most intricate systems of propaganda human history has ever seen. On every major economic issue, we are constantly fed poll-tested narratives by politicians, pundits and other corporate shills designed to make us believe public policy is trying to help ordinary people, when in fact it is being used as a weapon against us.
He then gives "free-trade," "centrism" and belief in the "free-market" as examples.

Like I said...straight Chomsky stuff. (Understanding Power, Manufactuing Consent, Profits Over People, yada yada.)

Then again...reality has a liberal bias, doesn't it?

Check it out.

More later...