BRANDOLAND: Talking to God...For You!

Thursday, October 06, 2005

More Fun With Dobson

More fun with James Dobson:
"When you put that with all the other information that I have been able to gather - and you'll have to trust me on this one - WHEN YOU KNOW SAOME OF THE THINGS THAT I KNOW, THAT I PROBABLY SHOULDN'T KNOW, that take me in this direction, you will understand why I have said, with fear and trepidation, why I have said why I believe that Harriet Miers will be a good justice."
More "things" Dobson knows that he probably shouldn't know.

1. There is a 33rd Masonic level

2. Xenu defeated the Thetans over 75 million years ago

3. Abe Lincoln was gay

4. Styx & Journey will definitely tour together next summer...and they'll play a ton of Indian Casinos

5. Tom DeLay and Jack Abramoff go together like...tight jeans and Shirley go together like...

6. Bush's approval rating is below 40 (it's 37, actually)

7. Dagobert II was a descendent of Christ

8. Kate Winslett was totally rad on "Extras"

9. Karen Hughes is really creepy

10. Right now...Agent Smith is kicking Neo's ass

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Dobson talks to God, you know.

So does "Our Kid."

God told me to invade Iraq, Bush tells Palestinian minister

Methinks most of you read this yesterday. If you didn't:
President George W Bush told Palestinian ministers that God had told him to invade Afghanistan and Iraq - and create a Palestinian State, a new BBC series reveals.

In "Elusive Peace: Israel and the Arabs," a major three-part series on BBC TWO (at 9.00pm on Monday 10, Monday 17 and Monday 24 October), Abu Mazen, Palestinian Prime Minister, and Nabil Shaath, his Foreign Minister, describe their first meeting with President Bush in June 2003.

Nabil Shaath says: "President Bush said to all of us:

"I'm driven with a mission from God. God would tell me, 'George, go and fight those terrorists in Afghanistan.' And I did, and then God would tell me, 'George, go and end the tyranny in Iraq …' And I did. And now, again, I feel God's words coming to me, 'Go get the Palestinians their state and get the Israelis their security, and get peace in the Middle East.' And by God I'm gonna do it."
Cool.

Anything else?

"GEORGE, GO AND GUT THE ENDANGERED SPECIES ACT!"

Endangered Species Act's Protections Are Trimmed

"THAT WAS FAST!"
The Bush administration has succeeded in reshaping the Endangered Species Act in ways that have sharply limited the impact of the 30-year-old law aimed at protecting the nation's most vulnerable plants and animals, according to environmentalists and some independent analysts.
"OKAY THEN. I HATE ANIMALS. NOW, GEORGE, GO AND LIMIT THE AMOUNT OF MONEY THE RABBLE CAN MAKE IN THE RECONSTRUCTION OF NEW ORLEANS!"

Bush Suspends Pay Act In Areas Hit by Storm

"WOW!"
President Bush yesterday suspended application of the federal law governing workers' pay on federal contracts in the Hurricane Katrina-damaged areas of Alabama, Florida, Louisiana, and Mississippi.

*

The Davis-Bacon Act, passed in 1931 during the Great Depression, sets a minimum pay scale for workers on federal contracts by requiring contractors to pay the prevailing or average pay in the region. Suspension of the act will allow contractors to pay lower wages.

Many Republicans have opposed Davis-Bacon, charging that it amounts to a taxpayer subsidy to unions.
"DAMN STRAIGHT. I HATE UNIONS! TRIED TO OUTLAW THEM WITH THE 'BOOK OF DEUTERONOMY.' WHAT ELSE? THINK, THINK, THINK. I KNOW! MY PORTFOLIO IS FEELING A BIT...LIGHT. MY MILITARY-INDUSTRIAL STOCKS ARE...UNDERPERFORMING. GEORGE, GO GET ME SOME MORE MONEY!"

Senate Votes to Give Bush More War Funds

"WAHOO!"
WASHINGTON - The Senate voted Friday to give President Bush $50 billion more for the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan and U.S. military efforts against terrorism, money that would push total spending for the operations beyond $350 billion.

In a 97-0 vote, the GOP-controlled Senate signed off on the money as part of a $445 billion military spending bill for the budget year that began Oct. 1.
"445 BILLION! HOLY CHRIST! HEY, DON'T WORRY! ALL OF THAT CASH WILL GO RIGHT TO THE SOLDIERS!"

(Pause.)

"NOT! NICE DOING BUISNESS WITH YOU, GEORGE. I'LL GET BACK TO YOU LATER. IN THE MEANTIME, HAVE A DRINK ON ME! IT'S TOTALLY OKAY!"

Ugh.

More later...

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