BRANDOLAND: Talking to God...For You!

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

The Unidentified Iraqi

Strong language today. Brace yourself.

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Another crazy story from CNN:

U.S. military admits error in news releases - Statements had similar quotes from 'unidentified Iraqi'

Actually, the 'unidentified Iraqi' is a fake.

That's the "error."

Read on.
BAGHDAD (CNN) -- The U.S. military expressed regret Monday for issuing news releases about two separate attacks in Iraq that included almost identical quotes attributed to an unidentified Iraqi.

In both statements, the military quoted an Iraqi calling the attackers "enemies of humanity" and vowing to "take the fight to the terrorists," the latter an expression President Bush frequently has used in speeches.
"Do we have any 'unidentified Iraqi' quotes around here?"

"Yeah. Here's one. One that includes the 'take the fight to the terrorists' line."

"Good. They've been wanting us to, uh, push that one."
In the first news release, issued after a July 13 Baghdad bombing that killed mostly youngsters, an unidentified Iraqi spoke of terrorists attacking "the children."

In the second release, sent out after an attack Sunday near a police station in the capital, an unidentified Iraqi referred to strikes on "the ISF," or Iraqi Security Forces.

Task Force Baghdad with the Army's 3rd Infantry Division released both statements.

After the media contacted officials Sunday on the similarities, the military reissued the latest release without the quote.

"Task Force Baghdad Public Affairs regrets the confusion regarding two press releases issued in support of our operations July 24," said a statement Monday.

Although not referring to the quote in Sunday's release, it said there was "a draft press release which, due to an administrative error, was mistakenly issued on behalf of the 3rd Infantry Division."
Administrative error.

Ha!

Some dude forgot to remove the "ISF" thing from the copy.
Below are the two news releases from the U.S. military with the similar quotes:

From Sunday:

" 'The terrorists are attacking the infrastructure, the ISF and all of Iraq. They are enemies of humanity without religion or any sort of ethics. They have attacked my community today and I will now take the fight to the terrorists,' said one Iraqi man who preferred not to be identified."
Said one Iraqi man...who preferred not to be identified...because he didn't exist.

"The terrorists are attacking the infrastructure, the ISF and all of Iraq. They are enemies of humanity without religion or any sort of ethics. They have attacked my community today and I will now take the fight to the terrorists."

Guys?

NO ONE TALKS LIKE THAT.

that's the giveaway.

They talk like this: "Those motherfuckers blew up my fucking business, man!"

"Goddammit. I mean...shit...they killed my fucking car!"

"Do you see what happens, Larry? When you fuck a stranger in the ass?!"
From July 13:

" 'The terrorists are attacking the infrastructure, the children and all of Iraq,' said one Iraqi man who preferred not to be identified. 'They are enemies of humanity without religion or any sort of ethics. They have attacked my community today and I will now take the fight to the terrorists.' "
Sloppy.

Again, it's as simple as this: "Those fucking assholes blew up my neighbor's kid," said one Iraqi man who preferred not to be identified. "I'm sick of this shit. I swear to God, if I had a gun, I fucking shoot 'em all."

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No need for the fake Arab/English translation and 10th Century world-play.

It's bad b-movie writing.

Capice?

My head hurts already and it's not even 9:00.

Christian Publisher Pans POTTER, Presents Bible-Based Comic Alternative

Noooooo!
Many people, including some Christian parents and even a number of Christian writers and cultural commentators, claim (the) best-selling series by British author J.K. Rowling is harmless and even contains some morally positive messages. Meanwhile, Christian author Connie Neal has written a book called The Gospel According to Harry Potter, in which she contends that the sorcery so many Christians condemn in Harry Potter is only a literary device and that the books contain biblical messages that can be used to teach children about good and evil.

But TIM TODD protests that Christians who believe these wildly successful children's books about witchcraft and sorcery are really Christian allegories are being led astray. And in hopes of disabusing kids and adults alike, he is offering an entertaining, biblically sound alternative to Harry Potter in comic book form called Harry Polarity and the Sinister Sorcery Satire.
That...is a horrible title.
"The things that concern me about the Harry Potter series," the preacher and Christian publisher notes, "are things like sacrificing animals and emphasizing power, regardless of good or evil. Or offering up blood sacrifices, and things like boiling what seems to be a baby alive in a cauldron, or being possessed by demons -- these are not things that we want to have our children subjected to."
No. We'll just wait 'til the "children" are in high school. THEN we'll tell them about "being possessed by demons."

Jesus Christ.

More later...

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