BRANDOLAND: Talking to God...For You!

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Good News, Citizens!

Good News, Citizens!

From the AP:

"Exxon Mobil Earns Record $8.42B in 4Q"

Hallelujah!
DALLAS - Exxon Mobil Corp., the largest U.S. oil company, said Monday it earned a record $8.42 billion in the fourth quarter and $25.33 billion for all of 2004, as higher prices for oil and natural gas erased a slight decline in production.

Exxon Mobil, the world's largest publicly traded oil company, just missed $300 billion in sales for the year.
I'm proud to report that we are doing our part here in Los Angeles. "Regular Unleaded" is back up to $2.15 at the Sunset/Farifax Mobil.

"We can do better!"

You bet.

What else? Oh, yeah.

More on the missing 8.8 BILLION DOLLARS from The Australian:
A review of 10 payments -- ranging between $US120million and $US900 million -- made by the CPA between October 2003 and June last year found none included documentation such as budget spending plans.
Come on. Who needs "documentation and spending plans?" Totally unnecessary.
One of the main benefactors of Iraq funds was Vice-President Dick Cheney's former company Halliburton, which was paid about $US1.7billion to bring in fuel for Iraqis.
There's the "H" word again.
Mr Bremer rejected the audit findings.

"The draft report assumes that Western-style budgeting and accounting procedures could be immediately and fully implemented in the midst of war," he said in a statement.
I'm pretty sure the investigators would've been happy with ANY-style of budgeting and accounting.

I assume that EASTERN-style budgeting and accounting was out of the question because it's...what...done by hand? Without those pesky, Western computer thingees?
Mr Bremer said any delays in paying Iraqi public servants' salaries would have raised the security threat to Iraqis and Americans and cost more lives.
Well that worked.
But the report said: "The fact the Iraqi ministries ceased to or had never functioned, lacked basic tools and operated in a cash economy was precisely why the CPA should have provided oversight of the financial management of the funds."
Okay. Tricky bit in that last sentence. "The fact that the Iraqi ministries ceased to or had never functioned...was precisely why the CPA should have provided oversight of the financial management of the funds?" WTF?

"Are you saying that money went to 'ministries' that didn't exist?"

"Dunno. There's no paper trail."

"Cool."

"Hey, make the check out to the old 'Iraqi Ministry of Parks and Fun Places.' Right?"

"Actually, I'd just ask for a blank check."

"Wow. You're right."

More later...

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