BRANDOLAND: Talking to God...For You!

Tuesday, April 08, 2003

LET THEM EAT CAKE.

Hi. I’m back with a real doozy.

Hopefully, you’ve heard these comments by now.

Please read this excerpt from Jimmy Breslin’s syndicated column dated March 21, 2003.

“The following is from an immensely interesting transcript of Barbara Bush on an ABC-TV morning show. She was asked if she and her husband, the former president, watch television.”

(Let me clarify for Mr. Breslin; the question is “do the elder Bushies watch coverage of the war?” Hold on, folks, here comes Ma Bush.)

"He sits and listens and I read books because I know perfectly well that - don't take offense - that 90 percent of what I hear on television is supposition, when we're talking about the news. And he's not, not as understanding of my pettiness about that. But why should we hear about body bags and deaths and how many, what day it's going to happen, and how many this or what do you suppose? Oh, I mean, it's, not relevant. So why should I waste my beautiful mind on something like that? And watch him suffer."

Whoa.

Whoa.

Whoa.

Where do you start with that one? It’s not even worth it.

Compassion. Intellectual curiosity. Strong genes in that Bush family, huh? Well, that quote proves one thing; the elder Bushies did have sex (at least once). Can’t see much family resemblance in ol’ Jeb, but W looks like Pa and definitely sounds like Ma.

“So why should I waste my BEAUTIFUL mind on something like that?!” Your BEAUTIFUL MIND?!! Babs, your beautiful mind can’t even articulate what “that” is! Something like “that?” What are you referring to? The Fox propaganda that scrolls by on the bottom of the screen, the latest Verizon commercial (“Can you hear me now?”) or the sight of Sean Hannity? Oh, I know what you mean, I get it, but you Bushies have a neat little habit of reducing important nouns to “this,” “that” and the “other thing.” Christ, your husband once referred to civil disobedience as “the civil disobedience thing” and his unpopularity with female voters as “the women thing.”

“I also feel a little uncomfortable sometimes with the elevation of the religious thing.”

Thank you, 41.

That’s a direct quote from the 80’s, folks. Or should I say “a folksy quote.”

Fun game. Put Barbara’s words in W’s mouth. Pretend that W is standing on the 18th tee and about to tee off when a White House reporter (and I use the word “reporter” VERY loosely) asks him to comment on reports of high numbers of Iraqi civilian casualties. Now re-read the following statement in W’s voice.

“But why should we hear about body bags and deaths and how many, what day it's going to happen, and how many this or what do you suppose? Oh, I mean, it's, not relevant. So why should I waste my beautiful mind on something like that?”

Thwack.

“Nice drive, sir.”

Scary, huh?

You know what? Babs is right. Why should she waste her beautiful mind on “something like that?” She deserves better (because SHE IS better). Come to think of it, why should we waste our beautiful minds on “something like that” when there are so many more important “things” to worry about?

Who’s gonna win the latest “American Idol?” The fat dude or the dude from Camp Pendleton? Should I renew my subscription to Entertainment Weekly? What if I don’t? How will I now what’s going on in the world or what to buy? (God, it sucks that the chick from “Alias” broke up with her real-life husband. That’s Hollywood for you, I guess. I wonder if she’ll ever find love again. Can’t wait to find out.) And that article I read on msn.com about why my significant other won’t sleep with me. Is it true? And what about all that crazy “Union talk” that’s been going on down at work? “Those people” should just shut up realize that they are lucky to have a job.

And how about this quote. “I know perfectly well that - don't take offense - that 90 percent of what I hear on television is supposition.”

Hey. Does that include the stuff we hear from your son?

I’d love to know what Babs is reading. Any guesses? Dr. Phil? The Motley Crue bio? Woodward’s latest love note to her son?

Depressed in Hollywood,
Brando


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